Texx Big Burger – Challenge the biggest burger in Surrey!
When I got the call from Craig over the Easter weekend with this week’s Takeout Challenge contender my stomach did a double take when he told me Texx Big Burger was on the menu. But, but I ATE LUNCH TODAY!! Surely I would need at least a few days prep time and to set out a grueling training regimen for myself if I was to conquer the infamous Texx Big Burger Challenge. I had attempted before with stomach-churning results…read on for the gory details (and a sick video!) if you’re feeling brave.
Thankfully Craig compromised and we settled on a slightly less daunting sounding Single Texx Mixed Burger ($15.99). Yup, in Texx Big Burger’s land of meat and bun-ny 10 ounces split between two patties (one chicken one beef) counts as a “single”. Do not be taken in by their low prices and innocuous menu descriptions, every item at Texx Big Burger is custom created to dislocate your jaw and clog your arteries.
The Texx Big Burgers themselves are endlessly customizable on the consumer end with much of the upgrades being free if you order at the restaurant or get take-out through their website (their Skip the Dishes menu charges for some of the add-ons including the grilled onions shown). I added red relish, mayo, ketchup, honey mustard, lettuce, tomato, crinkle-cut pickles and grilled onions.
The Texx Mixed Burger’s breaded chicken breast was the star of the show. It was moist, tender and flavourful, often overcoming the flavour of the beef patty during bites from the thicker portion of the breast. There was enough chewy bacon to give you a taste in every bite and they were equally adept and generous in spreading the rest of the ingredients across the massive bun. As much as I liked the bun, it’s just too thin for the contents and the bottom couldn’t hold up to the juices halfway through and started to break apart. The top half had held up a bit better however so I just switched my grip and polished it off Aussie-style upside down.
The double layer of cheese on the Mixed Burger was more than enough and what I was the most over by the time I finished the burger. EXTRA cheese ($1.50) is an upgrade option but I can’t even.
Their Regular Fries ($4.75) were another cruel joke. Stacked several inches high on a 10.5×10.5″ plate, this is Texx Big Burger’s smallest portion available. You heard that right, this is Texx Big Burger’s idea of a small. Can you imagine what monstrous heights their “Medium” fries tower to?
The fries themselves were lightly browned, a delectable mix of soft and crisp, and the brown paper bag in the first pic should give you some idea of just how greazy they are. At least the bag soaks up some of it and they serve using the same paper bag system when dining in.
While I’m sure this meal packed enough salt to drop a moose, I didn’t notice it until I’d “finished” and had to down several gallons of water throughout the rest of the evening to recuperate. Yup, those quotes are there for a reason. Even this standard Texx Big Burger meal was a challenge and I was left staring forlornly at a plateful of fries and more than three quarters of my Small Gravy ($1.99) despite having ate them along with the burger at a pace greater than I normally would. The gravy was a standard beefy brown, no lumps or clumps.
But if you think that was a challenge…
…You haven’t tried the official Texx Big Burger Challenge! With a heaping helping of meat that rivals even the legendary Sandwich Nazi these Super Texx Burgers ($33.99) pack in three TEN OUNCE patties with cheese and bacon, FIVE toppings of your choice, plus a big old bag o’ frites to pummel even the most seasoned food challenge vet into submission. See if you can spot me in the hall of fame above (hint – I look like I’m in way over my head).
I came sooo close…I had finished all but a few loose fries and had about two bites of the burger left with ten minutes remaining on the clock, but that two bites was the thin line between me puking all over the table and ruining my date, or walking away with some semblance of pride intact. Choosing the latter I spewed my guts into the toilet instead, no doubt impressing my long-suffering date in the process. Left to cope with severe meat sweats for days on end I swore that would be my last burger, but now Texx Big Burger has me tempted to give it another go. In the meantime check out this fearless reader’s valiant attempt and subscribe to our YouTube channel while you’re at it:
What was your experience like with the Texx Big Burger challenge? Did you have the cojones to attempt it or the guts of steel to actually finish? Is it on your bucket list but you have some trepidations? Let us know in the comments down below!